And now for today's Bible quote of the day (what? ... don't I do this in every blog?) that I happened upon on a Metro advert.
Luke 6:22
Blessed are you when men hate you,
when they exclude you
and insult you
and reject your name as evil,
because of the Son of Man.
Now this could be interpreted in several different ways. Does this mean that I am blessed because some Christians say that Jesus thinks all gay people are evil??? Here's a Biblical passage with some promise!!!
In defense of Christianity (but not of some Christians), I will say that it is a lame lame lame excuse to use religion as a cover for one's homophobia, ignorance, or just plain inability to open up to people who are different.
Seriously ... diverting blame to one's religion when backed against the wall for a logical reason why gay people shouldn't have equal rights in our society is an insult to the very principles that Christianity was founded on; love, compassion, and inclusion.
And enough of this "love the sinner, hate the sin" crap. I've had it with that. That's like saying "love the artist, hate the art". Don't they see? Art is part of the artist. You can't have one without the other, like love & marriage, horse & carriage, and getting through an episode of Charmed with a bottle of gin.
Now someone help me down off of this damn soap box!!!
Sunday, July 30, 2006
what have we become?
Surprising things that have reduced my faith in the human race as of yet:
-Last week I was about to get on the Metro and noticed a blind man having trouble finding the escalators. A tall, white man in a suit walked up to the blind man, waved his hand in front of his face, and then went about his business.
-CNN reporter: "There is concern that Americans could get caught up in the fire". Are we so concerned about Americans that we forget all the Lebanese civilians, and children? Shameful.
-In chatting with some deaf people outside of JRs, a man approaches and flails his arms extravagantly in our faces and laughs himself silly.
-Commercial: A fit, attractive man purchases tofu and health food at the grocery store, and then feels embarrassed when the man behind him is buying ribs and other barbeque goodies. The man immediately runs to the nearest Hummer retailer and purchases the gas-guzzling machine. Hummer catchphrase?: "Restore your manhood". WTF?!?
-A friend saying, "Companies suffer if they hire someone in a wheelchair. The cost of installing an accessibility ramp should come out of that person's salary".
-Hot dog eating contests on ESPN. While many in the world are starving, eating in America is done merely for our entertainment.
-Gallaudet is hosting summer programs for teens, both hearing and deaf. One hearing boy approaches a deaf boy and says repeatedly: "Talk, or I'll choke you".
-The fact that Jerry Springer, the WWF, and Medium are still on TV.
-Last week I was about to get on the Metro and noticed a blind man having trouble finding the escalators. A tall, white man in a suit walked up to the blind man, waved his hand in front of his face, and then went about his business.
-CNN reporter: "There is concern that Americans could get caught up in the fire". Are we so concerned about Americans that we forget all the Lebanese civilians, and children? Shameful.
-In chatting with some deaf people outside of JRs, a man approaches and flails his arms extravagantly in our faces and laughs himself silly.
-Commercial: A fit, attractive man purchases tofu and health food at the grocery store, and then feels embarrassed when the man behind him is buying ribs and other barbeque goodies. The man immediately runs to the nearest Hummer retailer and purchases the gas-guzzling machine. Hummer catchphrase?: "Restore your manhood". WTF?!?
-A friend saying, "Companies suffer if they hire someone in a wheelchair. The cost of installing an accessibility ramp should come out of that person's salary".
-Hot dog eating contests on ESPN. While many in the world are starving, eating in America is done merely for our entertainment.
-Gallaudet is hosting summer programs for teens, both hearing and deaf. One hearing boy approaches a deaf boy and says repeatedly: "Talk, or I'll choke you".
-The fact that Jerry Springer, the WWF, and Medium are still on TV.
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
little of this, little of that
Last week I was in Murky Coffee when a sudden pang of urgent hunger came over me. Although I was well aware that the nearby Starbucks offers tasty breakfast treats (including a low-fat sandwich), I thought that my hypocritical bitch-then-buy attitude with the conglomerate must come to an end, and that I would purchase a freshly-baked goody from the Murky folk.
To my pleasant surprise, I found that my bagel (the "everything bagel" ... is that like a black hole of random crap that's fallen into the batter?) was conveniently priced at $0.91, making it an even $1.00 after DC's exorbitant food tax and eliminating the need for the penny exchange.
And yes, we are often quite hard on our dear penny in our fast-paced world. We mock it, calling it "worthless", a "petty penny", and altogether "senseless" (hehe).
In fact, some people have gone to such great lengths that they have set up an entire organization devoted solely to the demise of our beloved Lincoln coin. www.retirethepenny.org is a website that has promised to bring about certain doom to our coppered friend (or fiend, is it???)
According to the website, this metallic menace costs $0.014 to manufacture, making it more expensive to make that its actual value (Um.... isn't that like any Britney Spears CD?). Apparently the zinc industries are lobbying to keep the penny in our piggy banks at all costs (hehe), requiring approximately $33 million every year from the US Mint.
This is atrocious!!! Why wasn't this brought to my attention sooner???!!!??? The website lists these reasons for the justified eradication of the penny: (1) waste of money, and (2) waste of time.
Hmm ... war in Iraq, and the penny. I see a similarity! Other than that both can be used to get oil.
To my pleasant surprise, I found that my bagel (the "everything bagel" ... is that like a black hole of random crap that's fallen into the batter?) was conveniently priced at $0.91, making it an even $1.00 after DC's exorbitant food tax and eliminating the need for the penny exchange.
And yes, we are often quite hard on our dear penny in our fast-paced world. We mock it, calling it "worthless", a "petty penny", and altogether "senseless" (hehe).
In fact, some people have gone to such great lengths that they have set up an entire organization devoted solely to the demise of our beloved Lincoln coin. www.retirethepenny.org is a website that has promised to bring about certain doom to our coppered friend (or fiend, is it???)
According to the website, this metallic menace costs $0.014 to manufacture, making it more expensive to make that its actual value (Um.... isn't that like any Britney Spears CD?). Apparently the zinc industries are lobbying to keep the penny in our piggy banks at all costs (hehe), requiring approximately $33 million every year from the US Mint.
This is atrocious!!! Why wasn't this brought to my attention sooner???!!!??? The website lists these reasons for the justified eradication of the penny: (1) waste of money, and (2) waste of time.
Hmm ... war in Iraq, and the penny. I see a similarity! Other than that both can be used to get oil.
Sunday, July 23, 2006
Starbucks Statistics and Charity
It's just like an annoying partner that dishes out really good sex; despite the irritation, you always end up coming back for more.
And so it goes with Starbucks.
There are a total of 127 Starbucks chains in the DC Metro area, and so the petulant partner peddles its addictive devices at every turn, corner, and fork in the road of the District.
Starbucks appeals to the American ideals of convenience and choice. Convenience because you can't take two steps without seeing the all-too-familiar rotund green sign, and choice because of the unending ways you can order a drink.
According to the Guide to Starbucks Beverages, "barista-speak" consists of 5 steps: the cup, the shots and size, syrup, milk and other modifiers (what) and the drink itself. There are 4 cup options, 5 types of espresso choices, 12 syrups, 6 types of milk, and 6 modifiers ... all of which can be ordered using the 36 vocabulary items printed in the front of the Guide.
In the "Giving Back" section of the brochure, Starbucks details how it goes to great lengths to help its local communities. "Each Starbucks store chooses a charity to receive its leftover pastries and past-date coffee". WHAT???
First of all, Starbucks is further contributing to the fattening of America with its butter-enriched pastries (another American ideal?) by donating high-fat and unhealthy foods to charities which probably serve an under-fed population. To add insult to injury, they are giving them stale coffee.
If it is past-date for the consumer, how is it still safe to give to charity? That's like donating expired condoms to a family-planning center.
Besides, I've seen the size of some Starbucks employees and I seriously doubt that many of the pastries make it to the "leftover" phase.
And so it goes with Starbucks.
There are a total of 127 Starbucks chains in the DC Metro area, and so the petulant partner peddles its addictive devices at every turn, corner, and fork in the road of the District.
Starbucks appeals to the American ideals of convenience and choice. Convenience because you can't take two steps without seeing the all-too-familiar rotund green sign, and choice because of the unending ways you can order a drink.
According to the Guide to Starbucks Beverages, "barista-speak" consists of 5 steps: the cup, the shots and size, syrup, milk and other modifiers (what) and the drink itself. There are 4 cup options, 5 types of espresso choices, 12 syrups, 6 types of milk, and 6 modifiers ... all of which can be ordered using the 36 vocabulary items printed in the front of the Guide.
In the "Giving Back" section of the brochure, Starbucks details how it goes to great lengths to help its local communities. "Each Starbucks store chooses a charity to receive its leftover pastries and past-date coffee". WHAT???
First of all, Starbucks is further contributing to the fattening of America with its butter-enriched pastries (another American ideal?) by donating high-fat and unhealthy foods to charities which probably serve an under-fed population. To add insult to injury, they are giving them stale coffee.
If it is past-date for the consumer, how is it still safe to give to charity? That's like donating expired condoms to a family-planning center.
Besides, I've seen the size of some Starbucks employees and I seriously doubt that many of the pastries make it to the "leftover" phase.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Stifling a giggle ...
Situations that have caused me to bite my lip recently:
-Asking for a person named "Bang Long" while making phone calls for temp work in an office.
-Seeing a book called "Catholicism for Dummies"
-A stranger in the dorms approaching me in my kitchen and asking "Would you like this bag of nuts?"
-Wondering what would happen if some mischievous students at Catholic University switched around a few letters of the dorm named "Pangborn Hall"
-Drag queen bingo
-The announcement in the Reagan airport: "Please maintain control of your personal belongings"
-Asking for a person named "Bang Long" while making phone calls for temp work in an office.
-Seeing a book called "Catholicism for Dummies"
-A stranger in the dorms approaching me in my kitchen and asking "Would you like this bag of nuts?"
-Wondering what would happen if some mischievous students at Catholic University switched around a few letters of the dorm named "Pangborn Hall"
-Drag queen bingo
-The announcement in the Reagan airport: "Please maintain control of your personal belongings"
Rescue me ...
"I believe there's a hero in all of us." -- Spiderman II
And let the pathology begin!!! It's been 5 days since I saw Superman Returns, and yet the feverous obsession initially sparked by a man in tighty-reddies (although I've been told the shade was maroon) has relentlessly gripped and crushed me into a wriggling giggling school boy with an insatiable desire to ... well, let's just say that I'm curious to know if the man of steel lives up to his reputation.
The movie itself was very convincing. I was so captivated that I even caught myself wondering "Where are you Superman?" when Gotham was in utter chaos. It seems that the belief in a superhero is not so farfetched, despite Wonderboy's lack of fashion sense (although you will hear no complaints out of this one, digital reductions aside).
This hero theme and the idea of being rescued seems to have followed me closely the past week. I just saw an episode of Sex and the City where the girls acknowledged that they wanted to be rescued from their imprisonment of singleness and solitude. And I'm currently reading "Sanctity and Male Desire - A Gay Reading of Saints", which idolizes the masculinity and salvation of the hero saints in Catholicism.
I started to wonder about the author and his strange obsession with the saints. According to him, this is not an uncommon occurrence for gay men. To which I thought- neither is the obsession with superheroes. Where in the psychology of being gay is there this need to be rescued, to be saved from the impending doom of a natural disaster or evil villain?
Or are they desires to be saved from situations that we (gay men) cannot control? Like a society that continues to deny us our rights, ignoring discrimination and hate crimes, and labeling us as an afflicted population ...
Undeniably there is a huge chasm between Superman and the scantily-clad saints of the Catholic church (or superheroes of any faith).
The difference is simple: Superman does not discriminate between race, gender, orientation, or any other human uniqueness. Everyone is a likely candidate for disaster, and everyone has an equal right to be rescued.
I cannot say the same for the Church.
And let the pathology begin!!! It's been 5 days since I saw Superman Returns, and yet the feverous obsession initially sparked by a man in tighty-reddies (although I've been told the shade was maroon) has relentlessly gripped and crushed me into a wriggling giggling school boy with an insatiable desire to ... well, let's just say that I'm curious to know if the man of steel lives up to his reputation.
The movie itself was very convincing. I was so captivated that I even caught myself wondering "Where are you Superman?" when Gotham was in utter chaos. It seems that the belief in a superhero is not so farfetched, despite Wonderboy's lack of fashion sense (although you will hear no complaints out of this one, digital reductions aside).
This hero theme and the idea of being rescued seems to have followed me closely the past week. I just saw an episode of Sex and the City where the girls acknowledged that they wanted to be rescued from their imprisonment of singleness and solitude. And I'm currently reading "Sanctity and Male Desire - A Gay Reading of Saints", which idolizes the masculinity and salvation of the hero saints in Catholicism.
I started to wonder about the author and his strange obsession with the saints. According to him, this is not an uncommon occurrence for gay men. To which I thought- neither is the obsession with superheroes. Where in the psychology of being gay is there this need to be rescued, to be saved from the impending doom of a natural disaster or evil villain?
Or are they desires to be saved from situations that we (gay men) cannot control? Like a society that continues to deny us our rights, ignoring discrimination and hate crimes, and labeling us as an afflicted population ...
Undeniably there is a huge chasm between Superman and the scantily-clad saints of the Catholic church (or superheroes of any faith).
The difference is simple: Superman does not discriminate between race, gender, orientation, or any other human uniqueness. Everyone is a likely candidate for disaster, and everyone has an equal right to be rescued.
I cannot say the same for the Church.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
The influence of DC ...
Ways that I have become more gay since my arrival in DC:
Last week I went to a tanning bed for the first time. They played house music loudly in the background.
I have learned and also incorporated the term "manscaping" into my general vocabulary, and, embarrassingly, into my occasional pruning.
I have used shampoo for thinning hair.
I have watched Priscilla Queen of the Desert.
I have started to use an oatmeal-based facial cleanser.
I drink Diet Coke while eating french-fries.
I know other uses for VHS-head cleaning fluids.
I have learned what "trick" means.
I read the Washington Blade more than the Washington Post.
I recently ordered a "grande iced mocha skim no whip lite ice" from Starbucks.
So much to learn ... I am an earnest pupil.
Last week I went to a tanning bed for the first time. They played house music loudly in the background.
I have learned and also incorporated the term "manscaping" into my general vocabulary, and, embarrassingly, into my occasional pruning.
I have used shampoo for thinning hair.
I have watched Priscilla Queen of the Desert.
I have started to use an oatmeal-based facial cleanser.
I drink Diet Coke while eating french-fries.
I know other uses for VHS-head cleaning fluids.
I have learned what "trick" means.
I read the Washington Blade more than the Washington Post.
I recently ordered a "grande iced mocha skim no whip lite ice" from Starbucks.
So much to learn ... I am an earnest pupil.
Thursday, July 6, 2006
Sodium (photos) may increase blood pressure
How times have changed!!! In just 100 years we've gone from horse and buggy to segues and golf carts. It seems our laziness is ever increasing, as is our tolerance for ostentatious displays of human flesh consumed by the mass public.
Don't believe me? Take the Morton's salt girl, for example (and no, this umbrellaed sex goddess is nameless ... although Sodium Chloride-ina has quite a ring to it). When initially introduced to consumers in 1914 she was an innocent curly-haired gal just shy of 10 years or so, skirt to her knees and clutching her oversized umbrella (incidentally, did you know that Mortons is responsible for the phrase "When it rains, it pours" ?)
In the 54 years to follow, our Iodine princess' skirt has raised considerably to Marilyn-Monroe status, hair straightened and pixie-like, and she is staring prodigiously at the generous hook of her umbrella (I kid you not!!!).
From frumpy to chic this savory sister has made quite a transformation. Although there have not been any revisions to Ms. NaCl since 1968, one can only imagine how she would appear were she to be re-drawn in 2006.
Inspired by the swimsuit beach models of Sports Illustrated, our Morton's containers would probably bear the image of some pubescent siren barely concealing her personals with damp patches of salt.
Check out the drawings from 1914-1968 at: http://www.mortonsalt.com/consumer/about_us/history/mug.htm
Don't believe me? Take the Morton's salt girl, for example (and no, this umbrellaed sex goddess is nameless ... although Sodium Chloride-ina has quite a ring to it). When initially introduced to consumers in 1914 she was an innocent curly-haired gal just shy of 10 years or so, skirt to her knees and clutching her oversized umbrella (incidentally, did you know that Mortons is responsible for the phrase "When it rains, it pours" ?)
In the 54 years to follow, our Iodine princess' skirt has raised considerably to Marilyn-Monroe status, hair straightened and pixie-like, and she is staring prodigiously at the generous hook of her umbrella (I kid you not!!!).
From frumpy to chic this savory sister has made quite a transformation. Although there have not been any revisions to Ms. NaCl since 1968, one can only imagine how she would appear were she to be re-drawn in 2006.
Inspired by the swimsuit beach models of Sports Illustrated, our Morton's containers would probably bear the image of some pubescent siren barely concealing her personals with damp patches of salt.
Check out the drawings from 1914-1968 at: http://www.mortonsalt.com/consumer/about_us/history/mug.htm
The Plague of Breeders
This is not a joke. The situation is out of control. There are simply too many straight people in this world.
On an excruciatingly boring Thursday night at work I did a profile search on MySpace for gay males within 5 miles of my hometown in Florida between the ages of 25-30 ... juuuuuuuuuust curious. Number of hits??? FOUR.
Fine fine fine ... if any man knows what's good for him he'll quickly run away from the excess flesh and lack of teeth that Polk County is famous for.
Perhaps the boys of Lakeland have moved on to conquer queerer pastures. A highschool profile search, then, for the gays of my alma mater.
NONE. It seems that I am the only gay man of the class of 1998.
Has anyone ever seen the British comedy show "Little Britain", and the Welsh character named Daffyd (David) that always laments "I am the only gay in the village" (check it out at: http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/littlebritain/characters/daffyd.shtml). It's almost my life.
Thank god for DC, my oasis in a desert of procreating freaks.
On an excruciatingly boring Thursday night at work I did a profile search on MySpace for gay males within 5 miles of my hometown in Florida between the ages of 25-30 ... juuuuuuuuuust curious. Number of hits??? FOUR.
Fine fine fine ... if any man knows what's good for him he'll quickly run away from the excess flesh and lack of teeth that Polk County is famous for.
Perhaps the boys of Lakeland have moved on to conquer queerer pastures. A highschool profile search, then, for the gays of my alma mater.
NONE. It seems that I am the only gay man of the class of 1998.
Has anyone ever seen the British comedy show "Little Britain", and the Welsh character named Daffyd (David) that always laments "I am the only gay in the village" (check it out at: http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/littlebritain/characters/daffyd.shtml). It's almost my life.
Thank god for DC, my oasis in a desert of procreating freaks.
Saturday, July 1, 2006
Peace and Freedom
"Our nation is free"
"We are laying foundations of peace for our young generations"
-- Bush, 29 May 2006
Freedom should be defined by those who have the least amount of power in a political system- their perspective isn't as plagued by privilege, greed, and ignorance. Fortunately, we live in a place where even the individuals with the least amount of power still hold more freedoms in our country than do many others in the world.
What scares me is this masquerade of democracy and freedom while the system is slowly closing in on the personal freedoms it so adamantly parades as its strong suit.
-Yesterday I saw a report on CNN saying that it is now legal for states to rezone their districts to maximize votes along party lines.
-The current administration is attempting to censor the media for the sake of national security.
-A single political party controls the entire government.
-Citizens are tying religious doctrine to their decisions at the polls.
And peace? It's so easy to turn a blind eye to the genocide and human rights atrocities all over the world, so long as those countries aren't of any economic benefit to us ...
I don't know what to do.
"We are laying foundations of peace for our young generations"
-- Bush, 29 May 2006
Freedom should be defined by those who have the least amount of power in a political system- their perspective isn't as plagued by privilege, greed, and ignorance. Fortunately, we live in a place where even the individuals with the least amount of power still hold more freedoms in our country than do many others in the world.
What scares me is this masquerade of democracy and freedom while the system is slowly closing in on the personal freedoms it so adamantly parades as its strong suit.
-Yesterday I saw a report on CNN saying that it is now legal for states to rezone their districts to maximize votes along party lines.
-The current administration is attempting to censor the media for the sake of national security.
-A single political party controls the entire government.
-Citizens are tying religious doctrine to their decisions at the polls.
And peace? It's so easy to turn a blind eye to the genocide and human rights atrocities all over the world, so long as those countries aren't of any economic benefit to us ...
I don't know what to do.
Interesting tidbits ...
Random things I find interesting:
Commercial
"30 day supply of StaTight free, only pay shipping and handling and promotional fee"
Starbucks cup
Starbucks is proud to use the "first-ever post-consumer fiber cup", however on the reverse side it is written "intended for single use only"
Commercial for bug killer
"It kills bugs three months longer."
Fact
Since 1988 the blueberry muffin has been the official muffin of Minnesota.
Commercial for Levitra
"Call your doctor if your erection lasts longer than 4 hours" (holy god!!!)
Commercial
"30 day supply of StaTight free, only pay shipping and handling and promotional fee"
Starbucks cup
Starbucks is proud to use the "first-ever post-consumer fiber cup", however on the reverse side it is written "intended for single use only"
Commercial for bug killer
"It kills bugs three months longer."
Fact
Since 1988 the blueberry muffin has been the official muffin of Minnesota.
Commercial for Levitra
"Call your doctor if your erection lasts longer than 4 hours" (holy god!!!)
Food review, DC
"I get full just watching you" -- my practicum supervisor, watching me dine.
FOOD REVIEW
Busboys and Poets, 14th between U and V, NW
Faaaabulous, just ignore the pain in your lower back while hunched over coffee tables (sitting on couches). Pizza with pesto sauce divine, prices surprisingly reasonable, bookstore in the restaurant to entertain in case your date induces narcolepsy.
Red Hot and Blue, Rosslyn
Charming chain, lovely iced margaritas, BBQ galore. Tasty fried okra and potato salad, drinks served in a mini-pitchers that makes gay boys squeal "that's soooo cute!!!"
Washington Hotel
Sensational view of White House, Monument, and a bunch of stuffy white people paying too much for mediocre food. Burgers start at $9, but worth it for the view.
Mamma Lucias, College Park
Like a psychotic mix of Olive Garden and Fazoli's (no kidding --white linen tablecloth while bread and olive oil is served in a red basket and wax paper). Strip mall restaurant shooting for high class prices with McDonald's-style layout and decor.
Cake Love, U Street
Cake, pie, and brownie heaven- at least visually. Loses appeal after first bite, including the bite it takes out of your wallet (cupcakes start at $3.50). Tastier after a few drinks, cute café-style place void of florescent lighting.
FOOD REVIEW
Busboys and Poets, 14th between U and V, NW
Faaaabulous, just ignore the pain in your lower back while hunched over coffee tables (sitting on couches). Pizza with pesto sauce divine, prices surprisingly reasonable, bookstore in the restaurant to entertain in case your date induces narcolepsy.
Red Hot and Blue, Rosslyn
Charming chain, lovely iced margaritas, BBQ galore. Tasty fried okra and potato salad, drinks served in a mini-pitchers that makes gay boys squeal "that's soooo cute!!!"
Washington Hotel
Sensational view of White House, Monument, and a bunch of stuffy white people paying too much for mediocre food. Burgers start at $9, but worth it for the view.
Mamma Lucias, College Park
Like a psychotic mix of Olive Garden and Fazoli's (no kidding --white linen tablecloth while bread and olive oil is served in a red basket and wax paper). Strip mall restaurant shooting for high class prices with McDonald's-style layout and decor.
Cake Love, U Street
Cake, pie, and brownie heaven- at least visually. Loses appeal after first bite, including the bite it takes out of your wallet (cupcakes start at $3.50). Tastier after a few drinks, cute café-style place void of florescent lighting.
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